Angela Parlin

So Much Beauty in All This Chaos

Dreams & Reality #LongingforParis

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longing for parisA few weeks ago, I couldn’t wait to tell you about an amazing book I had just finished reading–Longing for Paris: One Woman’s Search for Joy, Beauty, and Adventure—Right Where She Is.

Written by Sarah Mae, author of Desperate, this book has quickly become one of my favorites. I’m telling you about it again, because today is Launch Day for this gem, and the message is worth spreading.

I could tell you again about how I couldn’t put the book down and I devoured it in a day, while my kids splashed away in the little blow-up deck pool and wouldn’t stop asking me for snacks. 🙂

I could tell you how Sarah Mae understands Mom-life, how she writes as a friend who’s been there, and you might just feel like she peeked inside your own heart.

But instead, let me ask you a question, because I’m guessing you know what I’m talking about.

Do you know that struggle between what you want—and what you want to want?

Sarah Mae has wrestled through that tension, and shares her story in this book, encouraging us to take our desires to the Lord.

She reminds us that God formed our inward parts, as Psalm 139 says. He wove each of us together, and He cares about our dreams.

Is it hard for you to believe, that God cares about your dreams?

In many cases, He has placed those dreams within our hearts. But they’re not always meant for right now. Some dreams are meant to be realized another day.

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Longing for Paris will encourage you to hold onto your dreams–but with open hands.

I’ve struggled through this myself, and maybe you’ve done the same.

I held tightly to some dreams. I was afraid of both stepping toward them–and also of not ever seeing them come true. In my daily life, I was constantly frustrated with how to work toward those–when other dreams of mine showed up like little people walking around, ALWAYS in need of something more.

In a season of desperation, I offered my dreams to the Lord. I handed them over again and again, until I was sure I had let them go.

I grieved the loss of what I had hoped for and completely said goodbye. At that time, I realized some of my identity was also wrapped up in that thing. That was a whole other tangled mess to unravel.

But God saw me through. He showed me that He cared, and reminded me of His goodness. And then I realized He didn’t agree, that me and my dream had broken up–and that we were never ever ever getting back together.

The dream might not end up looking like I always thought it would look. But it wasn’t over, and it started getting good when I offered it back to Him.

So I love this question Sarah Mae asks in Chapter 1 of Longing for Paris:

“Is it settled in your heart that {God} is good?”

Even if your longings are not fulfilled this side of heaven, will you trust God?

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You realize by now, the book is not really about Paris.

It’s about the way our longings can lead us to the One who filled us with dreams and fulfills our deepest longings.

I’ve been to Paris, and yes, I fell madly in love with the City of Light. But the truth?

“Paris can only ever give me a glimpse of the true thing I yearn for: to be with my God in all of His splendor.” ~Sarah Mae

I think you will love Sarah Mae’s new book. Order it here!

 

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Longing for Paris {Book Review}

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longing for parisToday I am thrilled to tell you about an amazing little book I just finished reading, Longing for Paris: One Woman’s Search for Joy, Beauty, and Adventure—Right Where She Is. Written by Sarah Mae, author of Desperate, this book has quickly become one of my favorite books on the shelves.

I received an advance reader’s copy, as part of her launch team, and I devoured the book in one day.

I couldn’t put it down.

The kids enjoyed a day of splashing in the blow-up deck pool, while I highlighted in excess and mastered the art of read-walking (around the house) because too much time sitting…ouch!

What did I love about this book? Much more than I can put into a book review.

First of all, Sarah Mae understands my life as a Mom. She might as well have been taking down notes from my soul.

She gets that I long for the beauty of Paris, for soaking in art and music and getting lost in stacks of books, for time with real-live grown-up friends away from the kids, for a life of adventure and all the things that bring me joy in this life. But also, that my deepest desire is to love my husband well and to be there for my children in ways that only I can, to enjoy them and encourage them to really LIVE these lives they’ve been given.

But you know that recurring struggle between what you want—and what you want to want?

The desire to love the life you’ve been given—but also the dream of turning it into something better?

Well, Sarah Mae helps us understand how to live in that tension. The one between our dreams and our reality.

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Longing for Paris is a message of hope for Moms. It’s the encouragement we all need to embrace the season we’re in, while not denying the dreams God places in our hearts.

The point of the book is not really Paris.

“On the outside, I wanted Paris. But on the inside, what I was really searching for was a filling to the deepest parts of my soul. And I wanted to know what to do with Paris and my soul and my every day.” ~Sarah Mae

The point of the book is, longing for Paris (or whatever else it may be), leads us to the One who filled us with dreams and fulfills our deepest longings.

“Paris can only ever give me a glimpse of the true thing I yearn for: to be with my God in all of His splendor.” ~Sarah Mae

So, let’s see…my recommendation?

PRE-ORDER the book TODAY! Move this one to the top of your list. Share it with all your friends. Yes, it’s THAT good!

Order it here!

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Perfectionism, Cured

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Welcome back, friends!

What? You didn’t know we were taking a little break here? I didn’t really know either. But when I unplugged for a while, I enjoyed it so much, I just kept it going.

Today I’m back because I read an excellent book last week, and I think it’s one for all of us. Kathi Lipp and Cheri Gregory just released The Cure for the “Perfect” Life: 12 Ways to Stop Trying Harder and Start Living Braver. 

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Kathi and Cheri are leading a rebellion, because “Perfectionism isn’t Christian. It’s just crazy.”

I have history with perfectionism. Not perfecTION—just to be clear.

I was 14 when a close family friend passed away. He was like a big brother to us, so my sister and I went to see a grief counselor. Charlie listened to me talk and then offered some strange feedback. I wondered if he was confused about the purpose of our visit.

He started throwing around the P word, and I sat there thinking, I’m not a perfectionist. I’m the most not-perfect person I know! I didn’t want that label. Because if I was? Then I was a massive failure at it. If you’re a perfectionist, shouldn’t you be a lot closer to perfect?

He sent me home with a stack of handouts on black and white thinking. I highlighted only the parts that applied, so about ¾ of the pages turned yellow.

That was the beginning of my rebellion against perfectionism. Though it took almost a decade before I admitted to maybe-sortof, just a smidge of a problem.

I had the privilege of contributing a story to the book.

I had the privilege of contributing a story to the book.

 

Kathi and Cheri call Perfectionism a bully, along with Performancism, People-Pleasing, and Procrastination. These P-bullies share one common goal: “to convince you to pour all your energy into creating and maintaining an image. This image is based on who they say you should be.”

Oh, that word. Should. I lived under its pressure, always striving to be more, just to make it to where I should be. I did it as a teenager. A college student. A new wife. And then the shoulds metastasized, when I became a new mom. Should-ed on at every turn.

While I wish I’d had this book a decade ago, it reminded me how far I’ve come with this kind of thinking. Half the book didn’t even need  highlights. All glory to God!

See, fear is at the heart of Try-Harder living. But good news–“God wants to unlock the chains of fear, freeing us from its power”.

When fear rules, it’s an indicator that we haven’t fully experienced God’s perfect love. Maybe we simply need to take the little girl inside of us to Jesus, whose perfect love casts out fear. To me, Cure for the “Perfect” Life is a book about living brave, free from fear.

So come, join the rebellion! There’s room for all of us. Pick up a copy of this book, and join us at www.facebook.com/TinyActsofRebellion.

If you’d like a peek, click here to read the first chapter.

To find out more about this book, or to purchase it, click here. 

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Does Your Small YES Matter? {Another Giveaway!!!}

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RhinestoneJesus_spine_mockup A few years ago, Kristen Welch was just a mom from Texas, writing a blog about parenthood. And then she took a trip to Kenya, with Compassion International, hoping to encourage families to sponsor children living in poverty.

But when she experienced life in the slums of Nairobi, she couldn’t believe her eyes. “These living conditions were not for the living.”

Desperate and hopeless and angry, she silently questioned God. How can you allow this??? But she felt His response–Kristen, how can you?

It was that exact moment, when she knew her life would never be the same.

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Yesterday, Kristen Welch released her new book: Rhinestone Jesus: Saying Yes to God When Sparkly, Safe Faith is No Longer Enough. As part of her launch team, I am honored to celebrate this book with her, and to give away 2 copies on behalf of her publisher.

It’s taken me a couple weeks to wander through her story. It made me pause and pray and think about the state of my heart. It’s an encouraging story, one I think any of us could relate to in different ways.

Kristen started with a desire to make a difference in the world for Jesus. But things didn’t turn out the way she’d planned, and at some point, she stopped dreaming to simply survive life. God used her trip to Kenya to wake her up to His heart. Afterward, He gave her an opportunity to do something, and she said yes.

In Rhinestone Jesus, she tells her story of founding a non-profit called Mercy House Kenya, a maternity home for young girls in extremely difficult circumstances. It’s an amazing story, and chapters are still being written. As of May 1st, they are preparing to open doors to the SECOND HOME!!! Mercy House Kenya is growing, to accommodate more mothers and babies.

Kristen hopes her story shows us that our small yes matters. We often want to do something “big” for God, but she challenges us to lay the “big” down. To begin with the next small thing, right where we are. Say yes in your mess–yes to loving God and loving others. See one need near you, and do what you can to meet it. Don’t be paralyzed by ideas about what’s most important or about doing enough.

Say yes now in small ways, because when you love someone and care for their needs, you’re changing their world. And you’re changing yours, too.

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Now for the book giveaway: Please answer this question in the comments by Monday, May 5th at noon to be entered: What is just one way you can love God and love others this week? Do you know of someone sick or lonely or hungry or in need? How can you help someone in the next week?

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Surprised by Mom {Book Giveaway}

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I remember being 22, freshly wed and busy building a new life 12 hours from home.

12 hours from my Mom. Who I dialed up daily, because somewhere in time, she’d become one of my best friends. My chosen counsel. We didn’t need to squabble over the length of my shorts anymore, and I realized, by then, she’d only held me to high standards because she loved me.

One afternoon, I stood on the back deck of my first home, holding a bulky cordless phone in place, and watched my two little puppies play. Mom and I talked about living a life of purpose. I was trying to figure out what that meant for me.

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It sunk in suddenly. She was only 19.

When the doctor handed her my baby flesh, and she carried me over the threshold to Dad and my 14-month-old sister. Before her 20th birthday.

I thought about myself at 19.

A college sophomore, that year I went to a party with the boy I would marry. I studied and worked and played and figured out who I was and dreamed of all I wanted to do with my life. I loved that year. All those years. We had a ball without the seriousness of bills and jobs and adulthood.

But my Mom, barely more than a little girl caring for 2 baby dolls–she had us both so young. Young in years. Young in her faith in God. Young and crazy in love with my Dad. {Some things never change.}

Back when we liked our shoulders big and fluffy.

Back when we liked our shoulders big and fluffy.

I cannot comprehend how she did it. She was really an amazing (baby of a) Mom.

That’s not to say there weren’t those days. Those days she locked her bedroom door and cried her eyes out. And we had no idea what could possibly be wrong with her. Why did she ever need a break from us? We had no idea. There were 3 of us little girls then, burst onto her scene within 3 years.

Oh, now? I get it.

My friend Lisa-Jo Baker just released her first book, Surprised by Motherhood. In it, she says she’s learned 3 things:

  1. Motherhood is hard.

  2. Motherhood is glorious.

  3. Motherhood is very hard.

I could not agree more, and I waver between the 3. I often want a break, yet I never want this to end.

It’s the best thing I can imagine, but still I complain about the hard parts. Because you know, often their needs and issues get in the way of my desires. Of my life. And yet, my Mom never really had a life, of her own.

But she loved her life as a Mom. I mean, she wanted to control the outcomes. Who doesn’t?

And the three of us “learning to compromise” over dolls and toys and the neighbor’s dog and who would get to be Daisy when we played Dukes again…add the tears and drama and messes and tempers and high-pitched voices erupting in a house full of girls. She rarely lived a day without serving little ones around the clock. It was overwhelming sometimes.

I remember the whole circus fondly, but I never had to be the one in charge. I don’t know how she pulled it off, but I grew up feeling like Mom really loves this. Like it was all she ever wanted.

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And then we grew into 3 teenage girls at once, with our sweet, little Tany, our well-mothered (smothered?) baby sister trailing a decade behind. I’m sorry to say, we became a little gang of sisters, who thought Mom was the enemy, too often. We were well aware of all the things she did wrong. In our opinions.

It took some time before we were just as aware of all she did right. Of all her whys and how she tried. The ways she served and blessed us. Her hugs and presence and neverending “I love you“s. Her endless teaching of truth and skills she gathered when adulthood arrived so early at her doorstep.

Who would I be, without her? I mean, honestly. Who would any of us girls be? Without our Mom.

Mom

And her outer beauty has nothing on her beautiful heart!

 

**This post was inspired by Lisa-Jo Baker’s amazing, new, selling-out-everywhere book, Surprised by Motherhood, in which she tells her own unlikely journey to becoming a Mom after she lost her Mother at 17. The beauty of Lisa-Jo’s words help me make more sense of my own story, and I think it will do the same for you. Don’t miss this one!

Because I LOVE this book, and it makes me love motherhood more,  I’m giving away a copy Friday. Leave me a comment before midnight Friday, April 11th, and we’ll throw your name in the hat. 🙂 Just tell me one reason you’re thankful for your own Mom.

And if you have a minute, please watch the trailer  below. It’s worth your time. Tissues, anyone?

** Update: Congrats to Kyra C. for winning the book giveaway! I messaged you… 🙂

 

 

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