Angela Parlin

So Much Beauty in All This Chaos

What Are You Chasing?

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what are you running after

I call myself a runner, but I always feel the need to qualify the statement.

I’m not built like a runner. I’m not a fast runner. My mileage wouldn’t impress you.

But I get out there, onto the trail several times a week. And other than the last few months of four pregnancies plus a couple injuries which sidelined me for a time, I’ve been a runner as long as I can remember.

When I run, I’m usually smiling. It’s a strange habit, but I smile in part because running is my alone time. I walk out the front door, ready to move, and it’s like a big, deep breath. Plus a lot of panting, but still.

I smile because the finish line is always on the horizon, and I’m a hoper and a dreamer. I smile, because I need the opportunity to think my own thoughts for a bit. Thoughts about something other than school and the next meal and a million little tasks to do around the house.

Give me some fresh, quiet air under a big blue sky and the opportunity to think my own thoughts–and it feels like being home. Not so much like being in my home, but at home with myself. 🙂

Last week, out on the trail, one of my thoughts morphed into a pressing question:

What are you running after anyway?

I sensed it wasn’t meant physically, and it wasn’t actually coming from my own thoughts.

Do you not know that those who run in a race all run, but one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may obtain it. 1 Corinthians 9:24

I’d read this verse recently. Run in such a way that you may obtain the prize. To be honest, this is a little uncomfortable for me. I’m not one to go after the prize. It seems like everyone I know is competitive, and I’m certain it reveals something broken inside me, but it’s still the truth.

Yet this instruction tells us to run for it. GO AFTER IT. Run like you’re trying to win the prize.

Paul isn’t talking about running though. He’s speaking about our lives. We’re all in the race. We’re all runners, and we don’t need to apologize for whatever level we haven’t arrived at yet.

The course we run is the Christian life. But we’re not running to win the prize of salvation, since salvation comes by faith in Jesus Christ, and not by our own works. What, then, is the prize we’re running to win?

What are we running after anyway?

Jesus.

We’re running after Jesus, friends.

And I know it’s easy to say He’s the One we’re running after, but sometimes we’re pursuing so many other things.

Sometimes we’re running after everything else, hoping something will fill our souls and fix our lives and make us feel better. Those things do make us feel better at times, but it’s temporary. It’s all just a Band-Aid, and it wears off.

In the middle of raising kids to know Jesus and writing words I hope will point people to Him, I sometimes find myself in a distant place, disconnected even. And since I find myself there, I wonder if you do too.

So what are YOU running after today, my friend?

Is Jesus the prize you’re seeking?

Are you pursuing His nearness?

Do you desire to simply know Him more? Is this enough for you?

He really is the Life we so desperately long for. Let’s run to win more of Jesus!

And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to Him must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who earnestly seek Him. Hebrews 11:6

*******

Now this is eternal life: that they know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom You have sent. John  17:3

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Kelly Balarie (22)

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We Can Make Our Plans

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plans

I had a plan for the weekend.

I stuffed an entire suitcase. I packed outfits and shoes for each day. I gathered journals & pens & vitamins & snacks. I confirmed a hotel room. I cleaned the car, inside and out.

I looked forward to enjoying the company of some long-distance friends. I was all ready—to run out the door, to drive down the road with a friend, and to soak up all kinds of help I needed at this weekend retreat.

I’ll be honest, it had been a long week at home. First, some of the kids were home from school a few days with coughs, and then my oldest struggled through a high fever for days.

And then something worse happened. I–the Mama taking care of everyone else–started to feel sick.

At first I tried to deny it and told myself I was okay. Mind over matter, right? I tried to stick to the plan. To not be sick.

But hours later, I knew. I was not heading out the door for anything, especially a fun weekend retreat.

Lord, I know that people’s lives are not their own; it is not for them to direct their steps. Jeremiah 10:23

I may have had a plan, but my plan was not going to happen…

Find the rest of this post at PurposefulFaith.com, where I’m sharing today.

 

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When You Need to Move Forward

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mature move forwardMaturity is a hot topic around our house these days.

These kids are determined to grow bigger, taller, and smarter each week, and along with that, they’re determined to grow in freedom. Sometimes I wish I knew how to slow it all down.

We often explain to our oldest two, that in this area or that, we need to see a little more maturity before we can allow greater freedom.

Strangely, there are days when it appears maturity is decreasing rather than increasing. Anybody else?

It probably has something to do with approaching the teen years. But let’s just say we’ve lived a number of wide-eyed, dumbfounded, What did he just do?  moments around here. Since we’re only beginning this new stage, I have a feeling we need to be ready for more of that to come.

{Parents of teens & grown children are shaking their heads yes.} 🙂

But all this talk of maturity doesn’t only apply to our growing children.

The writer of Hebrews spoke to a group of seasoned believers who seemed to have slipped backward in their faith, maybe all the way back to where they began. They were seasoned, yet spiritually lazy.

He was teaching them about the significance of Jesus as their High Priest, when he said–

“It is hard to make it clear to you because you no longer try to understand.” (5:11)

One–I think I may have a lot of use for that line.

But two? Ouch.

Could this reprimand be meant in any way, for you and me?

I think of how I’ve run from complex spiritual topics at times. When it overwhelms me or I can’t figure it out, I move on to something else. But maybe what I need is to work out my faith in those areas.

Maybe I don’t need to try to figure it all out, but to persist in understanding.

I think of the spiritual disciplines I have declared “too hard” for me. The ones I’ve rationalized with, I’m just not there yet.

Or the times I committed to read through the Bible in a year. But when I got “stuck” at Leviticus, I skipped a number of books or abandoned my plan altogether.

Yes, sometimes, even as grown-ups, we run away when things are hard.

So what does it look like to move forward to maturity?

Persevere.

Progress.

Keep at it.

Persist.

Move forward.

Take one little step after another.

It looks like growing our relationship with the Lord through solitude, the Word, and obedience.

Years ago, I finally persisted through Leviticus all the way to Revelation, without looking back. I kept moving forward through the Word, developing a greater thirst and a more complete understanding. All that forward movement caused more of the same.

You know what I think held me back before? I didn’t desire to grow. I wanted to have read through the Bible, but I didn’t want to do the hard work of thoughtfully considering ALL the words, even those in Leviticus and Numbers and the Chronicles.

But this is our calling–the calling He’s given all of us.

I’m not talking about reading through the Bible, though that could be part of it.

God calls us each to move forward, to move toward Him, to grow up in Christ.

Are you willing to follow His call, even when it’s hard work? Do you want what’s on the other side, to know Him more?

What step will you take today, to move forward, toward spiritual maturity?

Therefore let us move beyond the elementary teachings about Christ and be taken forward to maturity. Hebrews 6:1a

 

READ MORE at PurposefulFaith.com!

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The Way to Handle Life

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pray life tears emotions JesusIt doesn’t take much for me to shed tears.

Years ago, I took one of those 20-question quizzes, which used to populate our email inboxes. Before Facebook took over, we replied to all and read our friends’ answers one by one as they replied to ours. Remember that?

This quiz included questions about your favorite fruit, your most embarrassing moment, and how many days a week you cry. Random.

Guess what I learned?

Most people don’t shed tears every day.

Or at least that group of my friends didn’t. After I sent out my answers, some of them wondered if I was depressed. But I didn’t have anything to hide—I’ve just always been an easy cry.

I’ve been studying the book of Hebrews, where we see Jesus as superior to angels and prophets and the law that came through Moses. He’s our High Priest who gives us continual access to God’s Presence.

But we also see Jesus living out of his humanity, displaying strong emotion.

We see Him crying and praying fervently about what was to come.

We see Him struggle and still obey God, even through suffering.

We see Him fully dependent on God His Father day after day.

During the days of Jesus’ life on earth, He offered up prayers and petitions with fervent cries and tears to the One who could save Him from death, and He was heard because of His reverent submission. Hebrews 5:7

It’s the emotion here that stops me—fervent cries and tears to the One who could save Him.

This points to His time in the Garden of Gethsemane, when Jesus asked His Abba, Father to take this cup from Him. He was asking God to not let Him die in such agony–with the sins of the world heaped upon Him.

He didn’t want His Father to turn away from Him.

And He was heard because of His reverent submission. This last part of the verse is important.

Jesus asked for a different way, but He submitted to the Father’s will.

Yet not what I will, but what you will. Mark 14:36b

Is this the attitude you carry into your prayers?

It’s often not where my heart is, when I come to God with a need. I’m thinking, MY will, Lord, just say yes! I’m assuming I can see far enough ahead to know my way will work out best. I’m sure I know what I need.

But often, God shows me that what I need more than anything is to walk with Him and depend on Him.

What I need most is to lay my requests at His feet and say, Not what I will, but what you will.

Jesus endured His life on earth with regular time away from everyone else, praying to His Father–even though there were endless people to help and things to do.

Our lives, also, are meant to be handled with prayer.

May we follow Christ’s example to actively trust in God and depend on our Father through prayer. May we pray as an offering, sometimes including tears. Every day if needed.

Read this post also at PurposefulFaith.com!

 

 

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What Keeps You From Drawing Near to God?

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throne of grace draw nearDraw near to the Throne of Grace in every time of need, and do not be hindered by your own failures.

This is the encouragement of Hebrews 4:16 (see last post), where God invites us to come to Him boldly, confidently, and without fear.

Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. Hebrews 4:16, NIV

Sometimes our failures (our sins) interfere with our faith, and our actions (or reactions) keep us from entering God’s presence. We feel guilty. We forget His endless supply of mercy covers over our failures. Sometimes we don’t feel ready to own and confess our sins. So we hide.

But I wonder what else keeps us from the Throne of Grace? I’ve been thinking about this for a few days, probably because I needed to.

What keeps us from the Throne of Grace, from entering God’s omnipresent Presence?

What an incredible gift we have been given! We may walk boldly and directly into God’s Presence, anytime, anywhere. He hears us. He sees us. He cares about every one of our concerns. He invites us to come to Him, to drop off our fears and worries at His feet and leave them there. He invites us to ask Him to do more than we can imagine.

The very act of coming to Him is an act of trust.

Maybe that’s the biggest reason we ever fail to come to God in prayer. It’s an issue of trust.

It always comes down to trust, doesn’t it? If we could simply SAY we trust Him, I’d have this whole thing down. But trust is proven by our actions.

When I try to handle things on my own, without the Lord’s help, I’m not trusting in Him.

When I’m self-sufficient, rather than God-dependent, I’m trusting in me.

But that’s not the only time I’m trusting in me. When my failures keep me from coming to God (as I wrote about in the last post), in whom do I trust? Myself! Right? Then I’m trusting in my own goodness instead of trusting fully in His.

What about chaos? My reaction to too much chaos keeps me from God. When life swirls chaos around me and I feel unsettled, what I need most is time with the Lord. I need moments in the quiet of His presence. But often I just keep running through my days, as if I could outrun the crazy if I try hard enough.

Chaos and Busyness are BFFs. In my life, busyness has kept me from better things more often than I know. When things get too crazy, I tend to look to other little “saviors” to help me—hello coffee, TV, music, research/finding the “right” answers, friends, and venting my unforgiveness toward my kids… {Please note: I’m not saying any of these are wrong—except the last one, of course—but could I be wrong when I look to them to “save me”, instead of looking to the Lord?}

You could probably add reasons to my list, but I have a feeling they would also boil down to misplaced trust in ourselves.

If you will, spend some time thinking about it.

What keeps you from drawing near to God?

 

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