Angela Parlin

So Much Beauty in All This Chaos

Which Hope Are You Holding Onto?

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hope anchor“We just have to hold onto hope!”

She said it quickly, at the end of our short conversation at the shopping mall. Then she walked out the front door, and I didn’t have a chance to respond.

I immediately wondered, Hope in what though? Isn’t that the real question? What are you putting your hope in?

Which hope are you holding onto?

I’ve been facing that question since summer ended, as a number of changes happened at once in my life. I’m not a big fan of change, and the whole situation rocked me. I often felt discontent and discouraged. I struggled to choose joy…

Read more of this post at PurposefulFaith.com!

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We Can Make Our Plans

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plans

I had a plan for the weekend.

I stuffed an entire suitcase. I packed outfits and shoes for each day. I gathered journals & pens & vitamins & snacks. I confirmed a hotel room. I cleaned the car, inside and out.

I looked forward to enjoying the company of some long-distance friends. I was all ready—to run out the door, to drive down the road with a friend, and to soak up all kinds of help I needed at this weekend retreat.

I’ll be honest, it had been a long week at home. First, some of the kids were home from school a few days with coughs, and then my oldest struggled through a high fever for days.

And then something worse happened. I–the Mama taking care of everyone else–started to feel sick.

At first I tried to deny it and told myself I was okay. Mind over matter, right? I tried to stick to the plan. To not be sick.

But hours later, I knew. I was not heading out the door for anything, especially a fun weekend retreat.

Lord, I know that people’s lives are not their own; it is not for them to direct their steps. Jeremiah 10:23

I may have had a plan, but my plan was not going to happen…

Find the rest of this post at PurposefulFaith.com, where I’m sharing today.

 

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31 Days of Poetry & Writing Prompts {Peace of Wild Things}

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return to the wild peaceWelcome to 31 Days of Poetry & Writing Prompts–Day 6.

We should all spend time outside each day. I don’t know about you, but I spend too many hours indoors.

As a remedy, I sometimes I work at the kitchen table near the propped-open door to the deck. Hearing the wind rustling through the trees and birds fighting over seeds at the feeder does something for my heart. It’s not all the way outside, but it’s close.

Long ago, I posted this poem, one of my favorites, on the bulletin board at my desk, the one I don’t actually work at very often. 🙂 Enjoy.

 

The Peace of Wild Things

by Wendell Berry

When despair for the world grows in me

and I wake in the night at the least sound

in fear of what my life and my children’s lives may be,

I go and lie down where the wood drake

rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds.

I come into the peace of wild things

who do not tax their lives with forethought

of grief. I come into the presence of still water.

And I feel above me the day-blind stars

waiting with their light. For a time

I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.

///////////

I wonder if so often when I misplace my peace, if the answer is simply to spend more time outside.

I say I wonder, but I already know what kind of person I become when I spend extended minutes under the sky.

There I see the rest of the beauty, and it’s not that I forget the chaos of the day. It’s not that the challenges disappear or the discouragement dissipates.

Out there, I realize I can walk away for a bit and the whole thing doesn’t all fall down.

Ohhh, right–it wasn’t me holding everything together.

In the presence of still water or even angry waves, I remember I have no control over the things I fear. I remember Who does control all things–He Who is good and true and beautiful and eternal. Who is acquainted with all this growing old and wearing away and falling down and rising up again.

He Who endures forever and ever, Who is seen through all this worldly beauty.

The Lord is God, and He has made His light shine on us. Psalm 118:27

It takes a few minutes, but I confess the truth. I’ve been taxing my life again, imagining losses that haven’t even happened. Why do I continue to repeat this?

Once again, I return to the wild. I take a walk in the woods past the yard, thick with green and a melody of snapping sticks underfoot. I imagine snakes hiding out here like sharks in the ocean, hoping they’re at least as rare.

Somehow I’ve left the rest of the world behind me. I come into the peace of wild things, and their holy message sinks ever deeper to my core.

Like Berry, I rest in the grace of the world–and I’m free.

poetry writing prompts

Writing Prompt:

Name the forethoughts of grief with which you tend to tax your own life.

*Find this also at PurposefulFaith.com.

Click here to find more 31 Days of Poetry posts!

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When Those Who Wander Get Lost

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Wander LostI tore through the woods behind our home barefoot, chasing two tiny dachshund puppies, on repeat.

I was a young puppy Mom, and Bailey and Bear were my sweet, scrappy baby boys. They were fearless, but only because they were also clueless. They could sniff out a door open for adventure, faster than I could grab my shoes.

Bailey and Bear were happy at home, let me tell you. Spoiled rotten actually. It wasn’t that they wanted to leave our home, but they were made for the hunt. They loved to make us happy, but they also lived to chase after squirrels and birds and other puppy dog friends.

They were prone to wander beyond the walls of our home, beyond the confines of our fenced backyard.

It stressed me out to no end. I felt like a crazy woman. But when they ran? I ran after them. Because they were my babies. And while I believed they were the most adorable dogs ever made, I also knew their brains were small. Their hunting instinct and tunnel vision overpowered their intelligence, and I wasn’t going to let them get hurt. I wasn’t going to lose them.

It reminds me of the ways I also wander, and how the Lord comes after me.

“I have strayed like a lost sheep. Seek your servant, for I have not forgotten your commands.” Psalm 119:176 (NIV)

In this psalm, King David confesses to wandering off from the Lord like a lost sheep. He asks the Lord to chase after him. When he said “I have not forgotten your commands,” he recognized the Lord as His Shepherd. He was saying, I’m committed to you, Lord. I am your sheep. I have not forgotten your Word.

Still, he had strayed.

He was prone to wander, like sheep. Like my tiny puppy dogs. But more often, like me.

Here’s what amazes me about David’s confession. It’s the last verse–#176–of a long chapter filled with firm declarations of love for the Word of God.

It comes after commitment to God’s Word and the resolution to follow it.

Even then, David concluded—Lord, I’m lost again. I can’t fix this myself. I need you to come and restore me.

This is something I understand. For all my commitment to the Lord, one of my most common prayers (out of necessity) is this: Lord, Give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name. (Psalm 86:11)

In Romans 7:21, Paul explains this battle we face between the controlling nature of sin and our desire to stay near God. “So I find this law at work: Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me.” But that’s not the end of Paul’s teaching. Sin is deceitful, but we hope in the One who delivers us–Jesus Christ our Lord.

When we run away, Jesus runs after us.

Even as sheep of the Good Shepherd, as those who belong to the Lord, we sometimes wander away. We all get lost sometimes.

We need the Shepherd to help us find our way back home.

What does it look like when you wander away from the Lord?

Does your mind become consumed with worry over circumstances you cannot control?

Is your heart buried in fear of the unknown?

Are you distracted and preoccupied? Have you lost your desire to worship Him?

Are you entangled in a secret sin, feeling like it’s no big deal? Or like there’s no way out?

I don’t know where your heart is today, but in some way, I’ve been there. I want to encourage you to run back to the Lord.

God seeks us in and through His Word, and He loves us enough to come after us.

Will you ask Him to seek you? Will you allow Him to reach your heart through His Word?

Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you. James 4:7

 


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Life is a Puzzle, But We’re Missing the Full View

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Life is a Puzzle, But We're Missing the Full View

Some nights, my little girl stops me from heading out of her bedroom after I’ve tucked her in.

Before I move on to the next kid’s room, she needs me to help her sort through scary questions, unfathomable for a just-turned-9 year-old. Matters of life and death and everything in-between.

It’s a gift to talk deep with her, because I get to point her to the HOPE I know, again and again.

I get to help her see where Jesus resides within the gains and the losses of this world.

But it also tears my heart out. She’s seen enough now to know it’s not all going to be okay. Not in the way we would like it to be.

She’s seen the broken way of things here. She’s walked through loss and several near-losses with us. She’s wiped tears and cut out pink heart-shaped cards, adding stickers and cursive I love you’s. She’s served up comfort in mugs of hot tea with a side of dark chocolate & almonds.

She knows things I wish she didn’t know.

It’s a terrible world, one with ISIS and earthquakes and anger and leaving and loss. It’s a world where we sometimes shake our heads and cry and say I don’t know. I don’t understand.

Recently a friend of ours lost his sister suddenly. She was younger than me.

She’d had a hard run, and when he stood to speak at her funeral, he said, It seemed like she could never really catch a break in life.

He shared what he has left of her, his memories. He talked about how she loved to put together 5,000-piece puzzles, and laughed that there was one currently spread across a table at Mom and Dad’s house–missing that one piece like always. Then he asked a question, and it left a lasting picture in my mind…

Click here to read the rest of this post at PurposefulFaith.com.

 

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