Angela Parlin

So Much Beauty in All This Chaos

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Small {Five-Minute Friday}

February 22, 2014 By: Angela Parlin

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He climbs up on his Captain’s bed, stands tall and grabs onto little wooden sailboats floating from the ceiling. “Look, Mom, I getting this big! Now I can get the boats, Mom!”

He knows he’s the little one around here, and three’s as good an age as any to aspire to greatness.

I remember when I couldn’t wait to get bigger. Do you? I wanted to do everything all by my big self and keep up with my big sister and cousins. I dreamed of arriving, and there’s nothing wrong with looking forward.

But today he applauds his growth, and I cheer him on. You grow up thinking growth looks like climbing, increasing, spreading influence. You come up hoping to make something of your one little life.

Yet Jesus came in the quiet, small and helpless. He waited out childhood and grew through awkward years and lived three decades of limitations.

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I think of how Infinite made himself finite, to live His Father’s plan. He became a man of flesh to reveal God’s glory and His coming redemption–to reveal it to all of creation.

But people cared more about climbing. People have always cared more to achieve greatness, to accomplish, to make a name for ourselves.

Jesus’ disciples asked Him, Which way to greatness? He rattled our concept of greatness with His answer.

Be like a little child.

Humble yourself.

Serve.

Set aside your own needs, and become a slave to the needs of others. 

Forgive every wrong done toward you.

Go last.

Give your life.

Every day, we choose–elevate and climb, or lay ourselves low and serve. We choose to reach for the greatness of the finite, or the greatness of the Infinite.

Still the words of Jesus echo–Be small, my child, be small.

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*This is another Five Minute Friday post…find out more about FMF here.

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Garden {Five Minute Friday}

February 14, 2014 By: Angela Parlin

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Out the sliding glass door of our kitchen, past the homemade supersized deck, Mom kept the garden of my childhood.

All summer long, hair secured in a ponytail, she wore her swimsuit like a uniform. She tended our garden, pulling weeds on repeat. I still recall the taste of dirt on green beans straight from that garden, the only dirt I’ve ever enjoyed.

We remember what we remember, and gardens pluck memories long hidden.

Back then, gardens were necessary, both for budgets and strawberry rhubarb pies. Mom baked from scratch, before we learned a hundred varieties of flour, before we lost hours engrossed in conflicting research, choosing between taste and nutritional value.

The garden reminds me of a time before life got hurried and sterile. When we spent long summer days running through our above-ground pool yelling Marco…Polo. We slathered pale skin with olive oil and dumped lemon juice on big heads of hair. We lounged around the deck on black blankets, next to a fat, orange Fluffy cat who shared a towel with a happy little dachshund named Scooter.

Those were the days before life became processed and plastic. Before we took daddy steps to ensure all our opportunities came safety-guaranteed. We knew there were no guarantees then. It wasn’t just a slogan. We didn’t believe in perfect.

We lived simply. We pulled weeds and watered, enjoyed the angel food cake, and carried on neighborly conversations across lawns in the middle of the day.

I’m afraid I don’t have what it takes to garden successfully anymore. Time, for one, to understand this art. Consistency, attention, green sense… I fall short. I relate more to plastic than I do to earth, sometimes. I understand formulas, little screens filled with words, and the importance of success.

But I long for a time I can remember. For summer, childhood, a simple garden that fed us all, with regular old dirt and seeds and sunshine and water. Unfiltered and messy, days made easy.

**This is another Five Minute Friday post with Lisa-Jo Baker. Lisa just introduced a project she’s excited about today, to build a sustainable community in her homeland, South Africa. Phase 1 will be a community GARDEN!  You can find out more about this project here. I’d love for you to visit and take part in this opportunity.

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When Jesus Won’t Take the Wheel

February 5, 2014 By: Angela Parlin

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The days are long, but the years are short.

My pastor quoted this in a sermon, and I added to it—But the days are still really long.

It wasn’t a lot of comfort—or motivation—right then, that these years would pass quickly, and then I would miss them. I had two baby boys, just over a year apart. The years spread out ahead of us, a long and winding trail of unknowns. There were no formulas in parenthood, so I was learning.

It was bigger than I expected. More than I could handle. I had already begun to add in the extras, which I made into rules for being “a good mom”. I thought I was supposed to do it all, but didn’t know how.

People would say, “God gives us the strength we need each day”. But I didn’t know how to live in strength that was not my own. I begged, Jesus, take the wheel, but felt like He left me at the wheel, alone.

What do you do when Jesus won’t take the wheel? That’s what I really wanted to know.

I asked Him for help, but still looked to myself to get everything done. Someone has get up and do the stuff. Right?

I kept trying to figure things out. Surely I missed something. If I had the best organization or meal plan or diet & exercise schedule, or the best words to pray or something else I wasn’t thinking of, then life could be better. I just needed to figure out how to improve and find the “right” mix.

But here’s the truth: there is no schedule or method of organization or diet or plan or discipline that will fix this life. It’s not going to be ideal or stay balanced or be just right like the little bear’s chair. The responsibilities of this life will sometimes feel like far too much. It will be too hard. It will be more than we can handle, at least sometimes.

We need a God who is present to help us, a God who doesn’t only possess all the strength, but gives it away.

God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in time of trouble. (Psalm 46:1)

It’s not up to us—to try harder or keep figuring it out.

Now I can lay that idea down and seek God, believing He will help me. Now I can learn to trust in Him for my days, since I’m not so focused on my own abilities and performance. I’m growing in this. {At this rate, I’ll be growing forever.} But I don’t see growth as something to attain and skate past. Anymore. I hope this encourages you today. I hope we trust in the Lord and soar…

Seek the Lord and His strength; seek His presence continually. (Psalm 105:4)

But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint. (Isaiah 40:31)

 

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Hero {Five-Minute Friday}

January 31, 2014 By: Angela Parlin

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The 2nd grade worksheet asked about my hero. Easiest question ever. And it hasn’t changed.

My Dad, because he’s the greatest.

I called him hero long before I understood how heroic he really was. Is. He did nothing earth-shattering to earn the title, but all the little dailies added up.

My Dad loved his four girls and our Mama. He made us feel secure and took us out for Daddy dates—mostly Wendy’s frosty’s. He came to watch us cheer or sing, and wrote letters to say he was so proud to be our Dad. He spoke life with his words. He encouraged us often. I’ve heard him read the book of Proverbs aloud more times than I can count. Remember what Proverbs stands for girls? That’s right, Wisdom…Skillful Living. He served people, laughed with his whole body, worked hard, and played harder. He stayed when so many other Dads walked away. He still loves us like crazy.

He participated in the Army Reserves when we were small. When he left for Army weekends, my sisters and I held pity parties. We skated around the basement, wiping tears and singing along with his record.

Fighting soldiers from the sky

Fearless men who jump and die

Men who mean just what they say,

The brave men of the Green Beret.  

Green Beret or Black Beret, it was all the same to me. He was our Superman, as fearless as anyone. We didn’t want him to jump, and… Well, we just wanted him home safe.

When we were all grown, we bought him a Superman sweatshirt. We still believed Clark Kent had nothing on our Dad. I saw him wearing that sweatshirt just the other day.

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He was probably singing too. Growing up, we heard the same songs over and over. It is Well With My Soul. Amazing Grace. At the Cross. Or songs like Bad Moon Rising, one from his old days.

He still sings to my babies the same words he sang to us—

Rocking chairs, rocking babies, rock-a-bye, the rock of ages, side by side, we’ll be together always…

Or one of his other favorites, Davy, Davy Crockett, king of the wild frontier. My kids hear this and yell—Hey, that’s Grandpa’s song!

Don’t I know it. He owns a number of songs, if you ask me. Along with the Tarzan call, which he loved to shout out the back window on Saturday mornings to get us all going. I mean, make us all laugh.

When my husband was still my boyfriend in college, he met my Dad the first time. Afterward, he said, “Your Dad wasn’t anything like you said. He’s just a normal guy.”

I didn’t understand how he missed it.

No he’s not. My Dad’s a hero. 

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This is another Five-Minute Friday post with Lisa-Jo Baker. Join us! TGIF!

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Before January Gets Away

January 23, 2014 By: Angela Parlin

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I remember saying I would never peg my pants. Or wear capris. Or straighten my hair. Or marry someone who hunts. Or have 4 kids. Or homeschool. Oh, and I would never jump on the word-this-year bandwagon.

It turns out, I should stop saying I would never. Because all of the above proved I would.

Last January, I asked God for a word. It came instantly, and I wanted to trade it in for another. Because Victory? It didn’t mean a whole lot to me then. But I assumed God was fixing to make me a winner, which is a great way to think any day in January. 🙂

Let me back up a minute. In 2012, this verse kept crossing my path:

You give me your shield of victory and your right hand sustains me. You stoop down to make me great. Psalm 18:35

I wrote it on a card and stuck it in a drawer. It had my attention, because it kept showing up. But it didn’t seem entirely relevant to my life.

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But then God went ahead and redefined victory for me. He used this verse to show me victory was GIVEN to me—not something I could achieve. Victory comes from His right hand, not mine.

Victory is simply Christ living in me. Simply, but mysteriously. It’s for me to live IS Christ.

Victory doesn’t come into our lives by TRYING, but TRUSTING.

I know all about the trying. Trying’s all on me. But trusting? Puts it all on Him. If I trust Him completely, then I can rest in Christ and receive His grace. I can let go of the notion this life will be all I make it.

It’s hard though. We are all about our effort here. Life’s about what we do and the results we make happen, even within the Kingdom of God. But Victory in Christ is like eternal life—it’s not something we can gain by trying harder. Jesus gives it freely, to any who will let go (literally, give up) and take it.

What I learned most this year? I need to get out of the way. It’s not my effort that will produce my best life now. It’s only my willingness to trust in, rest in, remain in the Lord. My willingness to die to myself and find my life hidden in Him.

My goal this year is to let go of I’ve got this and all the other mantras. To get out of the way and let Him be my strength. To trust His dreams for me are better than mine. Even if His idea of better doesn’t match my idea.

I ended the year with a couple accomplishments, but nothing more important than Christ in me, the hope of glory.

May this be the banner I raise, in 2014 and beyond…

Thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. 1 Corinthians 15:57

I have been crucified with Christ, and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. Galatians 2:20

God has chosen to make known the glorious riches of this mystery, which is Christ in you, the hope of glory. Colossians 1:27

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Welcome to My Blog, So Much Beauty In All This Chaos~

I'm so glad you stopped by my little corner of the internet, where I write about the chaos of life & all the beauty we find, especially as we fix our eyes on Jesus. Thank you for sharing any posts you enjoy on social media. I'm so glad you're here!

~Angela
angela (at) angelaparlin (dot) com

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